On Sears hairdryer: "Do not use while sleeping".
On a bag of Fritos: "You could be winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside."
On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."
On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestions: Defrost."
On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom of box): "Do not turn upside down".
On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating".
On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body".
On Boot's Children's Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication".
On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness"
On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only".
On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use". (I gotta admit, I'm curious.)
On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: Contains nuts".
On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: open packet, eat nuts."
On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."
